Last Week: It's ok to fail?

It's been a great journey, and unlike many others I am very proud of what I was able to accomplish for the past 6 weeks. Chosun Saebub was a new experience for me, as I was able to have a deeper understanding of a real sword instead of sparring all the time with a bamboo sword. It was fun, helpful, worth the time practicing. It really felt like everything was going too well, and honestly I thought I would rock the Ted talk so easily......reality was like "child please"

My ted talk was awful. I was not able to present my whole script because I forgot half of my conclusion and endings, I did not even use 5 of my power point slides, and I did not check the size of the stage prior to the presentation, and I messed up big time performing Chosun Saebub.

Basically I needed enough space to take at lest 4~5 big steps for Chosun Saebub, and I did not notice that the stage was much smaller than that before my talk. So when I got up on stage trying to be all calm and chill, I saw how small the stage was, and from that moment I knew I messed up. I realized I was gonna have to shuffle my legs so awkwardly, and it really disturbed my focus. Whenever I think of shuffling I think of these two fools...

sorry

So yeah, I was very disturbed on stage. Thankfully though, I think I shuffled pretty well, even better than those two above. Unfortunately, after I finished performing my mind kind of blacked out. I completely forgot about my note cards, and I did not remember a single word from my script. Not knowing the words from my script, I could not even turn the power point slides. So basically I mumbled on with some really bad rap up and message. I feel extremely ashamed for not using the slide that had the Mr. Mcdaniel's bear stick, because I was so freaked out because of stage fright and embarrassment.

Oh by the way, I only did 4 of the 12 movements on stage, regarding the time limit I had, but here is the whole thing. 

In conclusion, my ted talk was a fail. I stuttered my whole script, I failed to engage with the audience and I did not even show what I have accomplished over the past 6 weeks. I was disappointed in my ability in public speaking, and realized how different it is to present in English in front of a stage, instead of Korean. However that is not my excuse, because it is something I must overcome with countless practice and dedication. This failure was a moment of realization how much I suck, literally, in presentations, and I MUST MUST MUST practice until I can call myself Ryan Zhao. 

Thanks for the awesome project gifted, see you later. 

P.S. I might be updating this blog later on related to my Kumdo life other than Chosun Saebub. So if you're interested, you are more than welcome to check it out! BYE 

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